Hi, hello, hi. I’m Jake.
I make work that makes headlines.And wins international acclaim.
(Also, stuff that doesn’t).
Over the last decade...
I’ve written raps for Bleacher Report,
Hacked doorbell cameras for Reebok,
Forced Allstate to commit a felony,
Rebranded a $4B unicorn startup,
Convinced Audi to give up car porn,
Trolled my way to Reddit infamy,
Nearly aided in FTX’s fraud,
Somehow managed to sell these,
Climbed these, broke this, lost that,
Ran some errands, caught a movie,
And solved hold music over lunch.
There’s probably more to say,
(Things I’m less than proud of).
But no one needs another writer,
Who doesn’t know when to shut up.
a
jakepreilly@gmail.com303-910-4628